“This somethin i usually talk to my bros about but i dnt they advice would help I think I need a female perspective.

Long story short, I love my girl. I never loved a girl before until her. I want to share the world with her kind of love, i see us together being a family….
But , for some reason as much as i love her & as much as i care about her feelings and try not to hurt her. As much as i see her being my future wife and mother of my kids & i know we still young & shit like that but thats who i want when that time comes……

BUT I Still cant help the fact i Sometime crush on other females. Like my heart, my soul is my girls to have and keep but i still feel urges to fuck with other females. Maybe cuz im still young and shit ? Idk but to get to the point

I want my girl I love my girl I dnt want to lose her. But i want to fuck wit other girls from time to time .. Nothing more nothing less . its just fuckin but i know its more than that to females. Ah nigga really dnt know what to do. I dnt wanna hurt herr dont wanna lose her also dnt want to neglect what i may want. Im confused dog lol. We been together for like a year too idk if dat would help wit your feedback. She help me grow & change in all my ways except this one. I havent cheated (physically at least) but im scared i will one day”

Mr.Crush-a-Lot, my, my my…

I’ve gotta start out by saying that I appreciate your honesty… fidelity is something a lot of people in relationships struggle with, just more notably men, but it is honorable that you’ve made an effort to resist temptation and to remain faithful to your girlfriend. But let’s be honest…

I personally think that just judging from what you’ve said, you truly do love this girl. You want your future to be with her and you recognize the important role she plays in your life. A girl that lifts you up, that supports you, and especially one that you feel like you know is being faithful – it’s rare. As far as being young (you didn’t say your age but I’m assuming late teens to mid twenties) and wanting to have fun, I can understand still wanting to play the field. But, to be fair, it’s not always worth it. If you love her and can honestly remain faithful and happy, stick with her. If you say she’s this important to you, don’t ever play her because then you’re definitely the bad guy. You’re the worst guy if you don’t tell her. It makes more sense to leave her behind and do you if you really can’t resist the urge to cheat in the future. See if you can maintain a friendship rather than being sneaky behind her back. I’m 100% sure that if the shoe were on the other foot, and she felt this way about you? You’d probably have a heart attack. You say these things are more serious for females than males but I’d have to beg to differ. No matter the gender, betrayal hurts.

If all you’re doing is crushing, it’s not the worst thing in the world. It’d piss me off it were MY boyfriend crushing a lot, but I know a lot of guys who have always sort of been that way, so I really do feel for you. Physically cheating on someone you’re supposed to be in a monogamous relationship with can put you both at risk, though. That’s in addition to the emotional pain and embarrassment that comes along with these things. The whole point of monogamy is security, to build something strong and special with one person. It’s about loyalty… you shouldn’t feel tied down or held back at all. Just enjoy being in love. Be happy with what you’ve got because if someone else was with your girl, I’m guessing all the beautiful girls the city wouldn’t be able to take your mind off her.

And like they sayyy, good things don’t always last forever, so maybe enjoy this while it does last. Not saying that it won’t last by the way, but if you really want to play the field, do it respectfully and try to end your relationship amicabally before you hurt her. Do for her what you would want her to do for you, out of respect if nothing else. And I’m sure you know how karma works.

Anyway, good luck with everything!

Ajeé